I hope you had a great January! Here’s what I got up to last month:
1. Corrupting the innocents. Nobody in my family reads, but that didn’t stop me from getting everybody books for Christmas. I was not hopeful that these books would ever get read. Guess what? My mom actually read hers! It was a memoir by one of those annoying TV psychics, so it wasn’t quality literature, but I actually got somebody in my real life to read. I never thought that would happen.
|This may not be the psychic from the book. Believe it or not, I don't know my TV psychics.|
2. Corrupting the innocents II. If you saw my December wrap-up, you’ll know that my dad gave me a lump of Trump for Christmas. The lump is a $1 coin with Trump’s face on it. The coin is so small that it came wrapped in additional photos of Trump, creating a tiny lump of Trump. Well, I didn’t know what to do with the lump, so I snuck it into my parents’ grandfather clock. I put it among my mom’s cherub collection because cherubs seem to live in a clothing-optional society. I thought Trump would be happy there. Unfortunately, my dad noticed the lump and demanded that I remove my wayward Trump. So far, I’ve refused. A standoff has ensued. Trump remains among the plaster cherubs.
|One of these things is not like the others . . .|
3. On a related note. I’m surprised my parents noticed the Trump so quickly. I once replaced all the photos of myself in their house with photos of an astronaut sloth. It took my mom four months to notice.
|It does look like me. I can understand the confusion.|
4. My life is a readathon. In early January, I participated in my first-ever readathon! You can see my wrap-up here. I’ve never paid much attention to readathons before because my whole life feels like a readathon, but it was fun. I loved seeing everyone’s updates on social media.
5. Trashy new addiction. Is anyone watching the reality show Hunted? I kinda really, really want to be on that show. I’m so incompetent at life that I’d probably get captured before I left my driveway, but it would be interesting. The show is like a cheesy thriller novel with slightly stupid protagonists. It’s perfect.
6. Attack of the drones. Someone kept flying their drone over my head while I was walking my dogs. Did you know that dogs hate drones? I didn’t, either. Whenever the drone got close, one of my dogs flew into a murderous rage and almost ripped my arms off to catch the drone. The other dog lost her freakin’ mind. She panicked and kept wrapping her leash around my legs. To make things more embarrassing, the sidewalk was icy, so I was falling all over the place while trying to control my idiot dogs. Next time I see a drone, I’m climbing a tree and killing it King Kong style. You have been warned, drones!
Books I Read
Some things happened in my personal life that killed my attention span in January. As a result, I had to DNF the longer books I was reading and focus on books that I could finish in one or two sittings. I read 13 new books, reread 1 old favorite, and DNFed 2 long books.
Persepolis: The Story of a Childhood - Marjane Satrapi
The Last Summer of Reason - Tahar Djaout
Between the World and Me - Ta-Nehisi Coates
The V-Word: True Stories of First-Time Sex - Amber J. Keyset (editor)
Witness - Karen Hesse
Let's Pretend This Never Happened: (A Mostly True Memoir) - Jenny Lawson
The Vegetarian - Han Kang
The Unintentional Time Traveler - Everett Maroon
Three Moments of an Explosion: Stories - China Miéville (DNF)
Clan of the Cave Bear - Jean M. Auel (DNF)
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone – JK Rowling (Reread)
Angel Catbird, Volume 1 - Margaret Atwood & Johnnie Christmas
Sex with Kings: 500 years of Adultery, Power, Rivalry, and Revenge - Eleanor Herman
Revolver – Marcus Sedgwick
I See Reality: Twelve Short Stories about Real Life – Grace Kendall (editor)
Guts: The True Stories behind Hatchet and the Brian Books – Gary Paulsen
Best Books Of January
1. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone – JK Rowling
2. Guts: The True Stories behind Hatchet and the Brian Books – Gary Paulsen
3. Revolver – Marcus Sedgwick
Most-Viewed January Reviews
3. There Once Lived a Girl Who Seduced Her Sister’s Husband, and He Hanged Himself: Love Stories – Ludmilla Petrushevskaya
Most-Viewed January Non-Reviews
All The Things!
All The Things (AKA unread books on my TBR shelf) = 35 books.
I’m currently reading This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab and Slasher Girls & Monster Boys by April Genevieve Tucholke (editor).